There have recently been some fantastic investigative features in the print and electric press on the touchy subject of female surgical circumcision, also called cosmetic labiaplasty. But I’m going to take this space to tentatively suggest that there is also room in the feminist movement for a discussion of that curiously taboo subject: male genital mutilation.
A growing numbers of boys and men, some as young as three or four, some as old as eighty, are turning to genital mutilation as a form of self-harm. This in itself is not a new phenomenon, but as the culture of shame, anger and idolisation around the male sexual organ continues to increase, the phenomenon of boys and men damaging their own genitals, sometimes with extreme violence, is gathering pace.
Though depression and paranoid schizophrenia play a part, the baseline reason is fairly simple: a lot of boys have no frame of reference for what their penis should look like. Men are taught to see the appendage as a source of unimaginable sexual shame and embarrassment, or as a symbol of a sick, overzealous , hypermasculised culture in which they did not ask to be included, or, more frequently, both.
I’m talking, of course, about the booming industry of surgical penis ‘enlargement’, the nearest male equivalent to labiaplasty. We’ve all had versions of those relentless spam emails, offering in poor English to furnish us with a magnificent schlong for the price of a university education.
Yes, it’s fucking political. Male sexual neurosis is massively damaging, to feminism, to society, and to men themselves. This is not male apologism, or backsliding, it’s one feminist’s request for more discussion of a damaging socio-sexual taboo, in the context of a blog post in which I get to shout ‘COCK!’ a lot.
Thanks to the stalwart work of feminist writers and bloggers, there are now a lot of good, informative sites out there setting the record straight on what real female genitals look like.
So where is the equivalent efforts to tear down the damaging fictions that young men internalise about their gender and physical sex? The rhetoric of dickhood is entirely misleading, with emphasis on stiffness, straightness, rigidity, awesomeness, bestiality and hard, raging, pole-like qualities.
In fact, as most people are secretly aware, even the most impressive penis is no fearsome beast. They are extremely fragile things, normally soft, squishable and defenceless, generally flaccid, delicate , painful when struck, sensitive to touch and temperature. Freud was wrong. It’s not women who ‘envy’ the fiction of the perpetually hard, straining, bestial cartoon-penis – it’s other men.
That envy can largely be blamed on the shocking lie culturally perpetrated to convince young boys that their genitals are supposed to symbolise their masculinity and accordingly be other than the sweet, small, defenceless things they are.
It is not surprising, then, that so many men and boys turn to surgery to change what they see as defective or abnormal, or to self-harm when they see a part of themselves as shameful and socially loaded in ways they reject.
Femininity is meticulously judged – from breasts to width of the waist and hips to degree of ‘curviness’ to hairstyle to set of the face and features. For men, only one specific part of the body is sexualised, and it’s kept under wraps, endlessly mythologised and certainly not featured in any fashion spreads.
In a perfect world, school PHSE lessons would include mandatory classes on sex and gender, in which children would be shown lots of photographs – not crude and misleading technicolour ink-drawings – of what real genitals look like. During these ideal lessons there would be open discussion of gender roles, physical sex, sexuality, feminism and gender egalitarianism.
Talking about the male body in a similar way, and specifically about the cock – unlike for women, the only explicitly sexualised part of a man’s body – might just promote similar much-needed debate about physical maleness, personal masculinity and the difference between the two. Or at very least, it might make a few more people hesitate before doing inadvisable violence to the most sensitive parts of their body and paying for the privilege.
(a longer version is over at Pennyred)
I think you have a point, though I am not sure how widespread this self-mutilation actually is. Your policy prescription is mistaken as the state (which embodies coercion and force as its very essence ) is an institution least qualified to educate children about their sexuality - yes, even less qualified than parents!
I think we can assume that genital self-mutilation is very rare, given that if you do a search for it on PubMed, you’ll find reports of single cases, which suggests that it’s pretty unusual since doctors feel that every case warrants a writing-up. Most of the people who do it are pretty seriously disturbed - speed freaks, schizophrenics, one guy with a rare brain disease. This is not “self-harm” in the conventional troubled-teenager sense. This is what a few people do when they’re crazy.
In terms of PHSE lessons, I don’t remember mine very well, but I’m fairly sure they involved photos. They certainly involved a discussion of penis size along with plenty of reassurance for people worried about their endowment… I’m not sure what more you could ask for from sex-ed.
Also it’s worth bearing in mind that an obsession with penis size is nothing new and nothing specific to our culture. In many parts of the world there are periodic outbreaks of panic among men worried that their bits are shrinking :
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Penis_panic
“During these ideal lessons there would be open discussion of gender roles, physical sex, sexuality, feminism and gender egalitarianism.”
You should get in touch with John Bercow. He’d love to hear all about your disgusting Marxist plans for children. (I’ve actually got his number if you’re interested) Maybe you’re advising him already, It wouldn’t surprise me.
Because of course Marx was well known for his views on the proper content of PHSE lessons. Can’t you think of a better insult than “Marxist”?
The problem with Laurie’s suggestion is that (at least at my school) it’s pretty much what already happens. Certainly compared to 20 years ago sex-ed in this country is most enlightened.
“Can’t you think of a better insult than “Marxist”?”
True. Gramscian would be more accurate:)
“Because of course Marx was well known for his views on the proper content of PHSE lessons. Can’t you think of a better insult than “Marxist”?”
It’s true. One week we were discussing tactics for avoiding muggers and the next we were considering commodity fetishism with reference to Das Kapital.
Ben
Most of this made me wince, but this made me laugh:
“So where is the equivalent efforts to tear down the damaging fictions that young men internalise about their gender and physical sex?”
Surely the difference between socialised masculine and feminine gender roles is a reflection on how male genitalia is percieved as external while female genitalia is percieved as internal, when the truth is that because this is only mainly so and as a result socialised gender roles fail to correspond accurately with the individual.
Perhaps Laurie would like to advocate for the naturist movement?
‘The problem with Laurie’s suggestion is that (at least at my school) it’s pretty much what already happens. Certainly compared to 20 years ago sex-ed in this country is most enlightened.’
Woobegone - I’d really like to see your school curriculum. It’s great that some people are doing it. The problem is that it’s very much a question of what teacher you get - we’re doing much better than we were, undoubtedly, but we’re still falling far behind the rest of Europe - and that’s a fairly good predictor for, ooh, high rates of teenage pregnancy and STIs…..
[...] post at Liberal Conspiracy about the cock is required [...]
“We’re doing much better than we were, undoubtedly, but we’re still falling far behind the rest of Europe - and that’s a fairly good predictor for, ooh, high rates of teenage pregnancy and STIs…..”
What you left-wingers don’t understand is that it isn’t so much a failure of British sex education as a failure of modern British society and culture. Adopting european style sex-ed programmes won’t make make the slightest differece to our rates of teenaged pregnancy and STIs. You will see this once Bercow’s satanic plans are implemented. Only a number of right-wingers (of which I am a one) understand the subtleties of human existence. Everybody else must catch up.
“a failure of modern British society and culture…”
Not very patriotic are you? Call yourself right wing? To France with you…
‘You will see this once Bercow’s satanic plans are implemented. Only a number of right-wingers (of which I am a one) understand the subtleties of human existence. Everybody else must catch up.’
Roger, are you for real?
Of course Roger is real. It’s just that his real name is, in fact, Melanie.
MDS approves of this article most whole heartedly. Freedom from the confines of feared inadequacies for all humanity!
There is nothing you can do if somebody want to fell in the pit.
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Nick