@ Kate (#16):

What Publicansdecoy said in the article pretty much deals with your musing:
‘it has something do with a residual attachment to illogical norms’.

I think the reason drag queens are the way they are is because while they’re an ‘amusing’ stereotype of femininity, they’re not threatening in any way. Comedy defuses tension rather than building it. I think if more and more drag queens emerged who were genuinely androgynous, people might freak out - in fact, it’s a common theme in much popular culture to have the unnerving androgynous figure (often a man who confuses other men), who raises the spectre of homo/bisexuality. So, you have the comic transvestite figure to help smother that, like the cissies in early Hollywood.

A whole lot of people lose out, but the conservative culture-providers get to make sure everything stays their way. :/

That’s just something I picked up in Queer Studies! :)

“The reason both men and women wear clothes that do not belong to their gender is because they don’t, for a variety of reasons, feel comfortable with the roles society has carved out for their genders.”

Is that you may be right for some but Shuggy is way off the mark for me. I first wore a kilt as a bit of a giggle for my wife who had often commented that men in kilts looked sexy. I was amazed by the comfort and freedom it provided. After the night out I did not throw it away as planned but wore it more and more. I expected some negativity from friends and family but did not get it. I expected grief in Tesco and certainly at the pub - nothing (well maybe a little gentle leg pulling in my local, but nothing more).

I bought another kilt and then added a similar length denim skirt to the wardrobe. No reaction beyond an occasional positive remark. Eventually I realised that so long as I was me and comfortable with myself no one else seemed to care. That realisation gave me a huge personal boost of self-confidence and I now need as much wardrobe space as my wife does (I don’t get it!)

So my reason for wearing skirts when it suits me is simple; why shouldn’t I be comfortable?

If you’ve thought of trying a skirt but fear a beating, I’d just say wear it with pride and self confidence; you’re more likely to get beaten up because someone wants your mobile phone.

Have fun, be yourself; you only get one shot at life.

It all started about 6 years ago when I bought a kilt. The comfort and sense of freedom that it provided made me an instant convert and i now only were trousers and shorts when the situation demands it. I have found that generally there are little or no negative reactions and that positive comments and compliments are quite frequent.

I have always felt that as individuals we should all decide for ourselves how we present ourselves to the rest of the world. People who do not know us personally judge and assess us by our outward appearance. So why should how we dress be determined by others who know nothing about us as individuals. If those important first impressions are so heavily influenced by our choice of clothing, we should not allow others to limit our self expression by trying to impose “rules”. We are constantly being pushed into boxes, catagorised and told what to to wear and how to behave. I have always hated the idea of uniforms and “corporate attire”. It seems to me that it depersonalises the individual so that they are seen as job functionary rather than as a person. The addition of a name badge does little to dispel the attitude that your are dealing with a “manager” or “sales assistant”. So you react with them in a way that denies their individuality. I admit that there are some jobs and professions where making the individual disappear behind a unform is an advantage, particularly with say the police, where they gain authority and anonimity through the uniform. You therefore relate to them not as individuals but as representatives of a larger body.

Wider acceptance of men wearing skirts is I think still a long way off. Although I have found little in the way of negative reactionsto my own skirt wearing, over the last six years not one on our friends has decided to do the same. Whilst it is tolerated and even sometimes admired, not one of many hundreds of men that I must have encountered whilst skirted has said to me that it was how they wanted to dress as well. I know that as a rule men do not chat about clothing etc so it maybe that some of secretly want to try skirts, but I suspect that really they are as concerned as I was originally about not fitting into the box any more.

Add to that that men tend to buy clothes as a chore - and so when buying jeans ignore the shirts section, the ties section, the shoes section, and presumably the skirt section of the shop - and a question arrises.

When I go shopping for “normal” male clothing, which is rare, I find it a chore cause the styles are all the friggin same for the most part. Oh sure there might be a difference in the pocket or belt loop, but honestly the items of clothing for men for below the waist are dull.

When I go to the thrift shop to find a new skirt for wearing around I find that the choices are wide. Leather, spandex, satin, cotton, and so on. Several lengths to choose. Tightness from super tight to very airy and loose, heck even the way the darn things are fastened vary. There are skirts I see and imediately want to see how it looks and feels on me. Jeans? Not so much, just want to make sure they fit.

Men’s clothing are borring, and men have been brought up over the years to not care for personal appearance. The only quality they were to express was function and ruggedness. It is more than time that men had a choice between a pair of pants or a nice skirt for a formal event. Still presenting a masculine image, but with a skirt.

I myself am a straight male that loves to wear skirts, and I also love leggings, and usually wear hosiery with my skirts, once again variety. I do my best to present a masculine image, I forgo the make up, and wear either no heel, or at most a 1 1/2 inch heel. No wigs, no fake hips or breasts, no squeaky voice, or other things associated with drag.

I am no more a cross dresser than the women that wear pants predominately. For the people that say the trousers worn by women are cut for women and therefore are feminine I say So what. There really is no way to cut a skirt for either sex, there is no inseam. Sure the hips can be a factor, but I have found women’s skirts fit me just fine. The only thing that make the skirts I and several other men wear feminine is societie’s hang up on gender issues. The idea that women are inferior still permeates our world, and women don’t help themselves in this regard.

I find it amusing that I run the risk of being called faggot when I find most of my gay friends wear jeans, or slacks and wouldn’t dare wear a skirt, unless it was for drag.

Men have limitations on their lives from birth and those are usually put there by their mothers. My little boy won’t cry, he’s a man, don’t be a wimp, oh boys don’t play with that, boys don’t wear that. Come ON.

Men do not wear womens dresses simply because in the past most female clothing was made to attract males. Not so much today but the damage s done. Lingerie has only recently being made of cotton. No self respecting female would wear cotton panties when I was a girl and I still think they are gross. Slips were sexy and silky and lacy. Dress were silk and polyester, soft and flowing. And all women wore stockings or pantyhose. And sorry girls but those of you who do not wear stockings, your legs do not look good.

So men would not wear things that were to attract other men. As well lingerie being silky would or could have a sexual impact on a male in that their sexual arousal comes from sensation on the outside and womens lingerie is very sensual and soft and slippery.

I do think there’s something to this argument - that it’s demeaning for men to want to present “feminine”, but empowering for women to do the same. Girl in guy’s boxers = sexy/comfy, guy in sweater dress = pervert.

In many ways it feels like we’re still living in the 1800’s. Men’s liberation just hasn’t yet happened, and we’re a ways away from gender equality.

For what it’s worth, I’m a happily married liberated man (crossdresser if you must). I only dress at home of course for my own safety, and not for “sex”. (I am heterosexual - not bi or gay btw). While I’d agree that skirts can be uncomfortable, I have a few sweater dresses I really wish I could wear out because they are so superior in terms of comfort to pants and a shirt.

One day, I hope the world will wake up and realize that women don’t make themselves beautiful for the benefit of men. When you finally realize that, it allows you to allow for the possibility that a man may want to be pretty too - and not for the benefit of men, but maybe for his own benefit and/or that of his accepting and open-minded wife. I’m the luckiest man in the world, and my wife and I share in both the “masculine” and “feminine” sides of each other - together.

I suppose it is all a question of what changes to the world the readers are interested in…

oh - and the question must be asked - who was left out of such a book to make way for fashion designers? After all - as Al Murray said - “Most of the hounds don’t know where the fox is - in fact most of the hounds don’t even know there is a fox. They’re just hapilly following arseholes… And that is all anyone needs to know about fashion.”